Epiphany. Both-And: The journey of motherhood and successful business.
I write about business. I write about women. I write about entrepreneurship and success. I write all this on my blog. But in my journal I write primarily about mothering. Mothering a fiery, emotional, amazing almost adolescent daughter. In my quiet moments my thoughts are consumed with mothering this child, and how every day my presence, my solidity my ability to create a holding space for her growth and her emotions, is the most important thing that I do.
Yet when I put my business hat on I write about business. I write about mindset. I write about marketing. I write about meaning. I write about authentic business creation. I write about women and their relationships to money.
Why don’t I write about women and their relationship to mothering in the context of successful business creation.?
Why did I never think about putting those two things together before?
Is there anything more authentic for a mother who is also a business women, than negotiating the journey of both-and?
It all just came to me while washing dishes, which I actually love to do with the warm water on my hands and the beautiful view out my window. I was washing dishes thinking about business and thinking about mothering while listening to Mary Black on Pandora really loudly and the light bulb went on.
The book that’s been hanging on the edges of my consciousness for 2 years now just became real. I haven’t been able to write it, though not for lack of attempts. Maybe because I was missing the fullness of the topic that needed to be spoken. Right now with the dishes drying in the drying rack, I feel like the book could write itself.
Both-And: the journey of mothering and business success – Vignettes, Stories, Authentic business success.
Chapters on the bipolar schizophrenic nature of holding a spot on earth for an emotional child who’s growing every moment and the requirements and desire of being a successful woman business owner wanting to make a meaningful impact on the world. The challenge and joy of holding those two things at the same time, sometimes within the same minute. Often within the same hour and without a doubt always within the same day. This is the book.
I imagine already the chapters, the headings that flow between business and mothering and the symbiosis of the two together. The lessons my daughter learns from my work and the lessons that I learn from her journey and my journey alongside her.
I was washing the dishes, my hands in the warm water, following my desire every moment today on the desire retreat. Each time my desire changed I followed it. I followed the bliss and found myself up to my elbows in warm water looking at the blue sky white snow mountains in the distance and I had an epiphany.
Both-And: The Journey of Mothering and Business Success
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Donna Merrill says
Hi Deborah,
I sure can resonate washing dishes, looking out the window and having those AHA moments. I do at times like that, doing a task. I think that’s when our minds wander as that warm water flows through our hands, soothing us.
I do believe your epiphany is wonderful. Why not write about motherhood too? It is the best job in the world. Running your own business, writing about women, success, entrepreneurship, etc. is fine, but you are a mother too.
I do find that many women and men have children that are out here doing business. It is one of the reasons why most want to work that laptop lifestyle. So we can be there with our children!
There is so much to balance and I find that writing about it will resonate with others.
-Donna
Donna Merrill recently posted…Are You Reaching Your Goals?
Deborah Tutnauer says
Isn’t that funny about the dishes Donna?!
There is something about up-to-elbows-in-warm-water, that seems to open the mind to all kinds of possibilities!
The Mothering and Business Success Theme reared it’s head in a huge way today. As you may know I’m speaking Wednesday night at Westminster College in Utah as the kick-off speaker for the Gore School of Business Lectures in Entrepreneurship 7 week series. In order to commit to this speaking event I had to of course arrange everything related to traveling, speech writing etc. Plus I had to find a place for my child to “live” while I was gone, since my husband is away on business every week during the work week.
I was so glad when I had it arranged five weeks ago. My daughter was excited about the family she was staying with and their girl and mine have been making big plans in preparation. This morning, as I was literally dropping my daughter at school and beginning the 3 hours drive to the airport, I get a call. The whole family she was going to stay with is severely ill with a terrible stomach virus. The mom is a doctor and she said it was so bad she thought she might have to give her child an IV for dehydration!
Imagine what’s going through my mind! I started down my list of other friends, with a back up plan of putting my child back in the car with me and instead of driving and flying to Salt Lake City, I was prepared to drive the entire way (9 hours) and just bring her with me. Luckily, my closest friend, who originally was not available this week, had a change of plans and was home! Thank Goodness!
This little vignette is somewhat the norm for the combination of Mothering and Business Success!!
Thanks for your thoughts Donna!
~Deborah
Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Both-And: The Journey of Mothering and Business Success
Adrienne says
Hey Deborah,
Don’t you love it when that light bulb comes on and the thoughts just start to flow. Maybe you weren’t ever ready to write that book fully until now. Maybe you needed to have these thoughts and know exactly the direction you need to go.
I honestly don’t know how Mom’s do it all and especially single Mom’s with no help. My goodness, raising your family and going out there to make not only a better life for your family but a successful business in the process.
I think this would be a great book and I bet it won’t take you long to write it now. I wish you the very best.
~Adrienne
Adrienne recently posted…How Understanding Your Readers Can Lead To Improved Business
Don Purdum says
Hi Deborah,
Welcome home, I see you had a great event on social media!
Although I’m not a mom, a lot of men can learn from your message. I daily appreciate my wife for all she does for our family and for me.
Creating a strong family bond takes work!
Thanks for sharing your experience!
~ Don Purdum
Don Purdum recently posted…3 Ways to Separate Yourself From Those Who Sell the Same Thing You Do
Deborah Tutnauer says
Thanks for commenting Don!
Yes.. the travels were good to the first speech at Westminster College – Gore School of Business…though there was quite the glitch (in keeping with the theme of this article) resulting in some quick entrepreneurial thinking and solving a child care snafu literally minutes before I had to drive away to get to the airport on time for my flight.
I was back for just enough time to unpack and repack and now off again for another presentation. This time at Colgate University Thought Into Action Entrepreneur Program.
Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Coaching for Women Business Owners – The Feminine Way to Success