Rant! Integrity Money Selling

I got to rant the other day about Integrity and Money in the selling of services and products.

Money is a loaded topic that I’ll be talking about on the Fearlessly Questioning Podcast . In preparation for that event I did a rant and zeroed in on the selling process, particularly of coaching services, that can easily cross a line between integrity filled value and coerciveness.

Here’s the Rant about Integrity, Money and Selling.

It’s been a big few weeks of coming out quite strongly with my beliefs about entrepreneurship, business, coaching, selling, meaning and integrity.

This upcoming week I’m the guest on the Fearlessly Questioning Podcast with Joey Giangola and on the Unveil the Web Podcast with Don Purdum. It’s easy to find both on itunes and Stitcher!

When people hire a coach, their experience will soar when they work with someone whose values align with their own. I’ve found personally that when I work with a coach who has great skills but walks a different walk then me, there is a disconnect in my experience. Sometimes it takes me awhile to figure out what it is . Once I do, the entire unfolding comes clearly into focus. Like food, or clothing  or anything else we have strong tastes about in life – different strokes for different folks. No one way is inherently right or wrong.

Integrity, Money and Selling –> Tweet Now

For you to hire me to help you solve your entrepreneurial challenges around meaning, marketing and money I feel you have a right see me for all that I am and be able to differentiate my coaching process and value foundation from that of others. Thus, in these podcasts and interviews being produced over the next few weeks, you’ll see me a bit edgy – possibly making some people squirm, others sit up and take notice. Some will turn me off. Others will pick up the phone and that is truly the point of stepping up and being fully transparent in my beliefs and process.  That way you already have a good feeling about my values of deep integrity, kindness, honesty, independence and connection with nature.

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As always, I love reading your comments and hearing how I could best help you on your entrepreneurial journey. Share one challenge you have with Integrity, Money and Selling!



Deborah Tutnauer

Entrepreneur Business Success Coach at Deborah Tutnauer, LLC
Inspiring change in people for over 25 years, Deborah Tutnauer, MEd, MSWdigs deep to help authentic entrepreneurs move away from the stories that no longer serve them while clarifying and solidifying those that really do! Deborah helps frustrated entrepreneurs get exquisitely clear about meaning, purpose and expertise, then facilitates the creation of a financially sustainable and joyfully structured framework in which business and business people thrive.

Coaching both privately and in groups, Deborah is also a speaker, author, event leader and consultant. Creator of the Foundation and Framework Intensive, Question Master and Leader of the Entrepreneur Business Success Club, Deborah has been called an “Architect of Magical Business and Soul Structure”by her clients because she has a powerful ability to perform alchemy, changing passions and dreams into money and time by design.

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  1. says

    Hi Deborah,

    WOW! WOW! WOW!!!! I love this article and your video.

    You absolutely right, there is something wrong. I think this is one reason why I can’t get into email marketing and other online forms of marketing because the focus has been so one sided on the business selling and not on helping someone or making a difference in their lives.

    You really resonated with me because I’m really growing weary of those who are selling based on manipulation as you said in your article.

    When you’re left with manipulating and making people feel inferior because they don’t want to buy you; maybe you are the one who needs to look in the mirror.

    The truth is that marketing is not about me. It’s about my prospects! Sales is not about me! It’s about my prospects. Production or a product is not about me, it’s about my customer!!!

    When I make a promise to someone that there is never a commitment or obligation to buy me when I do a consultation, I mean it!!!!

    I know I give a lot of people a lot of value and there business is really helped in that hour we spend together. But that doesn’t mean that everyone should buy from me and they should never, ever, under any circumstance feel pressured to do so.

    If they buy from me it’s because not only did they get value but they also had the opportunity to buy me of their own free choice because it made sense for them and their business.

    I think for too many in our industry that’s hard Deborah because they are lacking in marketing and sales skills that allow people to buy without feeling like they are being manipulated. That comes from a deep insecurity or fear on the part of the seller.

    The other side that is sad is they know they are doing it and they don’t care or they’ve been taught wrong. They just want the sale. That’s even worse!!!

    Great post and video Deborah. Thanks for sharing your heart and for sharing the link to my website in your article. I can’t wait for our podcast to air next week!!!!!

    I hope you have a great week Deborah!

    ~ Don Purdum
    Don Purdum recently posted…3 Truths To Understanding Successful Internet MarketingMy Profile

    • says

      Right on as usually Don!

      But we both know it takes a deep sense of high self-worth and trust in the universe providing, to not be pushy when working with a prospect. That is why self-growth work might indeed by the most important way any coach or consultant spends their time.

      The clearer we are on ours own values and the more solid our self-esteem, the less the selling process is about us. The reality is that many are struggling financially and thus bring a level of desperation into their sales conversation, and that is understandable. What I feel is the missing link for those people is the idea that when you find a way WITHIN YOURSELF to stop feeling desperate and afraid , you open the doors to financial abundance. Of course hard work in the right manner is certainly necessary too!

      As always, I appreciate your thoughtful comment Don!

      Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Can I Afford a Business CoachMy Profile

  2. says

    I Deborah,

    I can’t agree more with that, this type of promoting and selling is wrong and I wonder how they can even get business.

    Well, after our wonderful conversation over the phone today, I can tell you that you’re not doing that, and yet you’re doing a great job.

    We should never try to make people feel bad for not choosing to work with us, I think it actually kind of show that we’re desperate. No good :)
    Sylviane Nuccio recently posted…Why Wordiness Kills Your WritingMy Profile

    • says

      Thank you so much for your thoughts Sylviane!

      I obviously agree with you, yet so many coaches in particular I feel are approaching the strategy-vision session with clients as primarily a sales conversation. I get why that is. I understand the funnel and the desire to increase conversions and not waste time, but integrity says that if you are there to help another, you must ride the fine line that I speak about in my reply to Donna Merrill’s comment above.

      Sitting solidly within one’s own core values and high sense of self-worth, helps one not cross the line.
      Thanks for your comment Sylviane!

      Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Can I Afford a Business CoachMy Profile

  3. says

    Hi Deborah,

    I love your rant! There is nothing worse than letting feeling people that they need your latest and greatest otherwise you are going to be in dead water. How negative, I wonder who falls for this? As a coach and marketer, I keep my eye out of what’s going on and Indeed….I too see a lot of this. I ask myself “what the heck are they thinking?”

    When working with people I like to make sure it is a good fit. I’m there to help them grow and if they are not willing to do the work, I just tell them straight out….maybe you can come at a later time. Or just tell them the truth. Maybe they are just not ready nor have the financial backing to run their business yet.

    I like to keep things upbeat and positive, and encourage others to keep on going and not quit. But never ever do I position myself as the gal with the magic wand that you need or else!

    Yes, Deborah, I do agree with this rant, especially those in the “coaching” business. Gosh, it takes an altruistic nature to be able to help another. It also takes some time to chat with that person to dig in and see what they really want to be achieving.

    When I do hire a coach myself to get a job done, I have to feel that fit, otherwise I walk.

    Good for you handling that conversation like you did. There is nothing worse than a company that hires people to read a script! If they are doing business that way, they need to wake up and train them to listen, figure out what the person needs and fulfill it.

    I am right there, by your side cheering on this rant!

    donna merrill recently posted…Link Dropping Pisses Me OffMy Profile

    • says

      Donna, one day you and I will have to RANT together!! I can only imagine some great power would come out of that!!

      I felt bad for the poor script reader lady. I kept trying to personalize the conversation and give her kudos for being relentless and try to get her to engage, but she was well trained to stay within her box. It was a bit sad knowing that this is what she did all day long.

      I don’t know if you’ve seen the many webinars advertised on FB these days that start off with wonderful value and then become a selling fest – while they profess to teach the concept of getting more clients easily without selling. For me, there is a disconnect and I can feel it in the webinar when the energy shifts.

      The fine line is to help a prospective client see beyond their own beliefs about what they are worth and what they can spend to grow, as a coaching process. But when the line is reached, to stop – not back off – but stop and stay strongly present while they sift through their own pros and cons internally – continuing to help them make their best decision but never saying anything that makes them feel inadequate or less than. It is a fine art, and my guess is that you too do it quite well Donna.

      Thanks for your comment and for sharing this post.

      Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Can I Afford a Business CoachMy Profile

  4. says

    Yuck Deborah! Loved the video ;) Your energy is fantastic. I’ve been on MORE than a few calls like that. I feel dirty after about 10 seconds. Do you know Bob Burg? He’s be right up your alley because he always talks about the exit strategy for folks, so they can easily choose to either say Yes or No to your offer, and things can flow freely.

    Power, vs Force. The pitcher/desperate/greedy/ I mean webinar runner ;) used forced to squeeze money out of you and since force negates, you were repelled. One with power, with authority and with posture doesn’t need anything from anybody; all goodness flows to them and they are calm, confident and of course, they become darn wealthy and free in the process.

    Love the message!

    Ryan Biddulph recently posted…How 2 Flamboyant Thai Lady Boy Prostitutes Taught Me (and You) 6 Clear Blogging LessonsMy Profile

    • says

      Hi Ryan,

      I believe I do know who Bob Burg is, but I am not sure I know much about him. Thank you for the suggestion.

      Have you read the book Power vs. Force or did it the concept just naturally flow as part of the conversation? If you haven’t read it, I highly highly recommend!

      Good to have you stop by and share your wisdom Ryan!

      Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Can I Afford a Business CoachMy Profile

  5. says

    Hi Deborah!

    This is my first visit to your blog. I discovered while leaving a comment on Adrienne Smith, my Coach and Mentors blog.

    I’m so glad that you have strong feelings about the three critically important subjects you mentioned! Because not many Coaches and or consultants would actually be bold enough to share some of their more private thoughts, on those subjects!

    Bravo! Because knowing where someone stands on any given subject, makes it so much easier to know if the two of you are in alignment!

    Thanks so much for sharing!
    Mark recently posted…How These Five So Called Best Friends Are Actually Sabotaging Your Chances For Long Term Success!My Profile

    • says

      Hello Mark and Welcome to my blog!

      I’m glad I touched a chord with you. It is so important I feel to do our work in full alignment with our core values. That is why my clients generally come to me with what they think are marketing struggles and end up doing some deep work on their values, internal stories and beliefs!

      I appreciate you taking the time to comment and I look forward to getting to know you better.

      Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Can I Afford a Business CoachMy Profile

  6. says

    Hi Deborah,

    I enjoyed listening to your rant as well, like the previous commenters did.

    Even though I don’t think I do it myself, it’s good to be reminded that an underlying negative coerciveness isn’t the way to go, even as a freelance writer. Reminders are always appreciated.

    I think for some people the focus is on learning all sorts of tricks and techniques in order to get the sale, which is fine to a point, but all too often they miss the human part of the process, like the script-reading woman who called you did.

    Clients connect with people they like and trust, and I think authenticity and integrity are definitely the keys to both parties getting the best out of a project. After all it’s so much nicer to work with someone with a similar outlook, as you point out.

    I think that’s what attracted me so much to the concept of business blogging.

    Thanks for the reminder and food for thought.

    Edward Beaman recently posted…31 Blog Post Ideas for Website Design AgenciesMy Profile

    • says

      You are most welcome Edward.
      Thanks for your thoughtful comment, and yes, there is a loss of the human experience when one puts aside their personality, values and essence to communicate like an automaton.

      Building real relationships takes longer than plugging people into a script or a system. The results as you know, are well worth the effort!

      Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Can I Afford a Business CoachMy Profile

  7. says

    Hi Deborah,

    Loved this rant – we’ve all been at the end of those scripted calls where they try to put you down if you’re not “buying”. People who do that to me don’t get a second chance. Even if it’s someone I’ve known quite a while trying to “talk me into something”. That means they are out for their own ends, and not interested in my needs and concerns.

    For organizations such as the one you describe, I will remind myself that I wouldn’t want to be with a group that sells that way – and if they have no information to let you make a considered decision….. well, to me that just means that if they give you “time to think”, the answer will be no.

    If they catch me on a day when I have a little time to spare I also enjoy trying to get them “off script”, but mostly I’m too busy for script readers.

    I just remind myself how lucky I am that I don’t have to rely for my income on doing a job that would make me feel “dirty” at the end of the day – and must set you up for so much rejection.

    I found your blog because I was also one of Enstine’s featured bloggers. Not sure how I missed you up to now, but I’m glad I found you :-)

    Have a great weekend. Joy
    Joy Healey recently posted…Social Media Fresh Start For Twitter Posting TipsMy Profile

    • says

      Hi Joy and Welcome to my blog!

      I’m so glad to meet you. Wasn’t that a wonderful post Enstine created? Not only did he highlight each of us so nicely, but in doing so, he brought together people like you and me who had not yet met.

      Your perspective on people and organizations who sell in “that way” is similar to mine as you read. The unfortunate part is that sometimes I feel they seriously don’t “get it”.. They are not trying to be do “dirty selling” but instead doing what they’ve been taught without the deeper consciousness to explore it further.

      Enjoy your weekend Joy!

      PS.. If you desire, please join my subscriber list from the sidebar form!!
      Deborah Tutnauer recently posted…Lead With Your Authentic Heart and Good Business Will FollowMy Profile

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